An engagement party was originally a wedding-themed surprise party: guests would attend, and only once they were there would the happy couple’s engagement be announced. Traditionally, the bride’s parents host the engagement party, but as times have changed, so has this role.
It’s truly anyone’s game – though it’s seen as polite to exclude the maid of honour and best man as possible hosts, as they’ll have other parties to organise.Sometimes people close to the twosome will volunteer themselves as hosts, but more often than not the couple take on the role of hosts themselves.
As times have moved on, and social media has become increasingly popular, most couples announce their engagement almost immediately, and the engagement party is more of a way to celebrate with their family and friends than to actually formally announce their intentions to marry. This means that the future newlyweds can plan and execute the party on their own terms.
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There’s no one date that’s perfect for an engagement party, and when the party is held is often indicative of the length of the engagement. A general rule of thumb is to make sure your engagement party is held more than six months before the actual wedding.
Be careful not to go too far in the opposite direction, though. Let yourself be engaged for a while before throwing the big party. Bask in the glow of just being in love and being together, and let yourself get used to the idea of being a married couple. Standard engagement periods are around a year to a year and a half, so three or four months in is generally a good benchmark that means you get a break from wedding planning, but still have plenty of time afterwards to hit the ground running.
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How early you send out your invites depends on how far your guests are going to travel to get there. Generally, a month in advance should do the trick, but if you’re holding your engagement party a good distance from your hometown and family will have to travel to get there, drop them a line a little earlier.
Your guest list shouldn’t be too hard to lay out, but make sure you don’t end up inviting the same amount of people to your engagement party as to your wedding (unless you’re having a small wedding!) – do however make sure that everyone who attends the engagement party is going to be a guest to at least the wedding reception. An engagement party is viewed by many as being part of the wedding celebrations, so if they’re in attendance they’ll probably be expecting an invite to the big day as well.
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Set a budget right from the beginning of planning, and stick to it. If you’re the happy couple and you’re planning your own engagement party, consider this a practice run for your big day. Stick to your budget closely, and if not, implement what you’ve learned when it comes to your wedding.
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There are no hard and fast rules as to what an engagement party should actually be – they can range from sit down dinners to backyard BBQs, held anywhere from a local bar to a big venue. As long as there are two people who’ve promised to be together forever at the celebration, it’s an engagement party.
If you haven’t decided on your wedding theme yet, don’t despair, because your engagement party doesn’t have to match up completely. Try and create the tone you want for your wedding, however, when you’re planning your engagement party. It’ll give people an idea of what to expect.
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Once again, there are no hard and fast rules as to what kind of food to provide at an engagement party, but you generally do have to provide food. If you’re planning an engagement party that’s outdoors, hiring a chip van is a cute and vintage option your guests are sure to love.
If you have other plans for food however, but want a showpiece for dessert, it’s also possible to hire traditional ice cream vans or vintage ice cream carts, depending on your tone. See our catering options here
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Most engagement parties are held during the day, and if that’s the option you’ve gone for, you’re probably going to want to keep things pretty casual. Fun activities like mini golf, or even archery, will get your guests involved and having fun while still maintaining a relaxed atmosphere.
This is a get together for a big chunk of your friends and family, so naturally, a huge amount of talking and laughing and introductions going on. Because of this, if you’re having musical accompaniment at your engagement it makes sense to have something simple, such as a soloist, jazz singer, or even a harpist or string quartet. [See all Music options] More understated music means that your guests can choose whether they listen to the performance or socialise.
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On the flip side however, if you’re planning the kind of engagement party that will have your guests ringing in sick to work the next morning, you’re going to need something a little bigger and bolder. If you and your future spouse are night-owls, then hold an evening party that goes on into the wee hours – don’t feel pressured into doing what’s conventional if it doesn’t fit with you as a couple! For these kinds of bigger parties, you can’t go wrong with a DJ or live band to get your guests in the party spirit. If you want to make the night really special, consider hiring in a professional mixologist, who can work with you to create a signature cocktail that sums you up as a couple!
No matter what kind of engagement party you’re throwing, the newly engaged couple are going to love the idea of a photo booth to commemorate their engagement celebrations. You can even order double prints, so that your guests can go home with their own copies as party favours, whilst the happy couple receive a guest book with all the photos inside, along with messages from their friends – a perfect memento!
For a lot of couples, an engagement party is the first time that all their family and friends will be meeting en masse, getting to know each other, and preparing to become one big group. No matter what kind of engagement party you’re planning, make sure it’s as fun and as inclusive as you can. Encourage your guests to mix and mingle with each other, and put some personal touches throughout the party to really make it special. Most importantly, remember that this party is about you and your guests celebrating together – get swept up in the happiness, relax, and get involved in the festivities!
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